micah wyatt. unabashedly shitty human

This co-author thing is catching on like wildfire. It’s pretty awesome for me because I don’t have to come up with the topics anymore. Another way for me to slack. OH YEAH!
So today’s co-author is Micah (like always, see bio below). Micah has a very special quality. He is the world’s best ditcher. He NEVER shows up for ANYTHING. I wish this was a joke. It isn’t.

Micah: It really isn't a joke, either. Andrea thinks that I only have this problem with her, but if you look at my overall history of social interaction, I'm a virtual helmet-wearing nincompoop with regards to actually getting anyplace on time. Or at all. This is not to say I sit at home and watch my walls deteriorate. I go everywhere. I just really really mess up PLANS. Also, I am a flake. Also, I make sure to TELL people (usually after a major offense) that I AM a flake. Consider me a butterfly with a half-broken wing. Yeah. That's about right.

First major offence: If you remember awhile back, I had a very big, very stressful Bookfest fundraiser to plan. Every single person that I talked to knew how stressed I was about it. I begged people to show up to it. Mostly because I thought no one was going to show up (don’t worry, about 500 people showed up). Micah had assured me he was going to come. The day came, from 8-11 I had so many wonderful friends roll in. Jeremy, Lish, Ryan, Callie, Preston, Carrie, Matt, Jake, Brenda, Kim, and I am sure there are others that I am missing. But no Micah. What a jerk. I was so stressed out all day. It was awesome to see my friends show up to support me. But no Micah.

Micah: This was a jerk thing. I felt WAY too hung over to be showing up for a family-oriented breakfast. However, this totally highlights my difficulties. Note the times: 8-11. Even the world's biggest hangover should not have kept me from attending. What a jerk.

Second major offence: My best friend Abby had come to visit me awhile back. We had an awesome time hanging out with everyone. She fit right in with all my friends (not surprised). On one of her final nights in town, we had a game night over at Carrie’s house. I invited Micah because game nights are fun and he had met Abby earlier in her trip. He gives me some bullshit answer about how he can’t come because he has something MAJOR going on. Like sitting, or running, or singing. All of which are NOT as fun as game night with awesome people. NOT COOL.

Micah: Well this MIGHT just highlight a different root of the problem. Sometimes I miss things because I am skipping through the daisies or had too many pbr's somewhere and end up talking with a grizzled old man at a bar instead of doing what I said I would do. However, on this occasion I had a legit excuse. Andrea forgets that I am all the things she puts in my bio below and I have a lot of my time already planned out for me. Also, she doesn't get to follow me in the rest of these pursuits, so she doesn't know I'm just as flaky in those respects of my life.

Third major offence: This past Monday, I was having some friends over to watch Monday Night Football. They were also going to be fixing some of my new furniture. Yet again, I invite Micah. He says he has some sort of practice or rehearsal but will be over afterwards. The game comes, the game ends. No Micah. Not too surprised. So after all these ditching, I think I may completely stop inviting him places. At least say you can’t come or whatever.

Micah: hahahahahahahahahahaha. Too many pbr's. And yes. A jerk. And yes. You should quit inviting me places - a little secret....if you DO, I'll probably start showing up.

I think that all friends should make themselves somewhat available to do things. I go out of my way, or over schedule myself to do things with friends, I expect them to do the same for me. I should get what I give!!!!!

Micah: No. I have fought long and hard to be accepted as a flake. I will not submit to this.

Co-author bio: Micah Wyatt, musical phenomenon, sort of almost lawyer, and hippy dancing extraordinaire. Loves them stars.