Pedicures can be bad

So Joe (my brother) just visited me this past weekend.
And it rocked. I love that brother of mine.
I actually love my whole family a whole ton.
It's weird, I know, but there you have it.

Unfortunately I will not write about his visit today.
I probably will tomorrow.
Today I will write about what happened immediately after Joe left the great state of Wyoming.
I will write about my super weird, pretty awkward, but mostly hilarious pedicure.

I love my co-workers at sbuxx...
So much so, that we actually try to hangout outside of work.
On this particular occasion, my friends Hannah, Brittany and Cassie were all about to chill.
We decided it would be fun to go get pedicures.

I don't exactly understand it, but I have always had pretty banged up feet.
I used to row in high school and they would always look bad from that.
Now that I work at sbuxx I'm always on them, so they aren't the prettiest of feet.
Sorry for that rather uncomfortable confession.
Andrea has bad feet. Ew.

Anyway, we all walk in and sit down at the pedicure stations.
I'm sure plenty of you out there have had a pedicure or two, but for those of you that haven't, the pedicure 'stations' are big massaging chairs with little foot tubs at the base of them.
They are pretty comfortable.



I sit down and let my feet soak for a few minutes.
Then the very nice, very experienced, very Asian nail tech comes over to start her work.
I try to warn her that my feet are probably worse than most of her clients, but I think all she understood was that I, like a normal human being, have feet.
So instead of trying to yell 'My feet are TOTALLY DISGUSTING!' at her a millions times, I just pick up a copy of People magazine, and pretend that I get pedis all the time.

One specific aspect of a pedicure is that you get your calluses removed.
For normal, pretty footed people, all it takes is some aggressive buffing with a pumice stone.
Not for me.

My very experienced nail tech saw that my feet needed special attention.
Bless her little heart.
She gets up from her seat and starts rooting around in a tool box.
She then returns with a mask and a very scary piece of equipment.
It looks like a mini hand-held drill.

My friends are awesome.
And also a little mean.
When the nail tech returns with her hardware, my good friend Brittany cannot stop laughing.
Then I start laughing.
Then the nail tech says "yes? for your calluses?"
And then she goes to town on my feet.
Have you ever seen Dumb and Dumber when Jim Carey's character is getting ready for that fancy fundraiser for the owls and he gets a pedicure? Go here if you haven't....around min 1:45.
Well that's what I felt like.
And it would have been embarrassing if that kind of stuff embarrasses me.
But by some stroke of luck, it doesn't.
It makes me want to share with the entire world wide web.

After the work was over, I actually have some very attractive feet now.
Feel free to look at them.
They even have flowers on them.
Holla!

Comments

  1. AnonymousJuly 31, 2011 at 6:52 AM

    Your are hilarious, my child!! I was laughing out loud only wish I was there to see it : ) Luv U! Mom

    ReplyDelete

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