family vacation

In couple weeks, I am going on a family vacation.

I haven't been on a family vacation for a good 4 years.

I love our family vacations.

Have you seen those Chevy Chase vacation movies?
Well my family is the Griswolds.
We are that boisterous family that somehow found their way into the cool club.
Totally on accident.

So to celebrate this upcoming family vacation, I will tell you some HILARIOUS stories from our last family vacation.
We went to Hawaii for ten days.
I remember everything from that trip.
Because it was the best consecutive ten days of my life.
And I kept telling myself to remember this trip.
I learned how to surf, listened to whales, went to a luau, and a bunch of other stuff.

Funny story #1
My favorite day was when we went snuba diving.
It's not scuba because you are attached to this tank that is on a raft.
So you can't really dive that deep.

My mom and dad didn't want to snuba, so they just snorkeled at the top of the water.
Joe, Alli and I all snubaed.
I have always been fearless in the water. So I basically dove down to the water as quickly as possible. Looking at all the fish and such.
Alli took a little longer, but she eventually made it down to the bottom.
Joe...did not.
Joe and I were connected to the same tank. Which was bad for me.
Because Joe was getting super claustrophobic or whatever, he kept sucking in all the air. So our tank went WAY down.
He kept holding onto his little air tube and wouldn't get any deeper than a few feet in the water.
It was comical to say the least.

And if that wasn't funny enough, there were TONS of tropical fish surrounding us.
And Joe kept swatting them away.
Now I have an irrational fear of critters, but Joe is way worse than me.
It is SUPER funny.
We have all these pictures that my parents took of us snubbing.
Alli and I are at the bottom of this sea volcano, and Joe is still skimming the surface.
They are sooo funny.

Funny #2
We are a family of swimmers.
We had a pool growing up, and we would spend all summer in it.
So when we were in Hawaii, If we didn't have anything planned, we would all go swimming.

Or at least down to the beach.
So one day in particular we go to the beach and the waves are CRAZY big.
We are all really strong swimmers, so we are totally geeked about these big waves.
There was one problem.
Big waves in the ocean are totally different than the big waves in Lake Michigan.
We all found this out extremely quickly.

A good Samaritan gave our family a boogie board right when we got there.
Joe decides to take it out and mess around with it.
On his very first wave, he is riding high on his boogie board.
Having tons of fun, then it starts to break, and crash down.
Taking Joe and the boogie board with it.
Joe must have hit the floor of the ocean at a vertical angle, because he snapped his board in half.
And ended up with extreme sand rash.
HAHA it was SO funny.
He was out there for about 2 minutes.

The next Staley victim was Alli.
My mom, dad, sister and I all go out to play in the waves.
But play soon turned into survival.
Alli had gotten knocked around by about 3 good waves and was completely disoriented.
And that wasn't the only thing that was disoriented.
In the wave pummelling, Alli's top had come off.
It was so bad because there were a bunch of people on the beach getting a free show.
My dad had thought Alli had gotten a couple of big cuts and was coming over to help her.
I kept yelling "BOOBS!" at her.
My mom was having her own troubles.
Eventually my dad figured out what was wrong with Alli and instantly turned away, I still kept yelling 'boobs", and my mom was eventually able to help Alli find her top.
It was seriously the strangest scene ever.

After that, my mom and Alli went back in to lay down and recover.
I guess when my mom made her way onto the beach, she was a sight to see.
Her hair was all messed up, and her swimsuit was all twisted around.
Making her boobs look like a Picasso painting.
My brother tactfully yelled at her to fix herself.
hahahaha. I'm sad I missed that scene.


I only thought I was going to die a couple times, so I stayed out in the water the longest.
My dad got carried away my the riptide one time, and that was freaky.
But he calmly made his way back.
And freaked out when he got to the beach.

So I am excited to see what hilarity will ensue on our next family vacation.
Things to look forward to:

• We will be in a different country
• We will be joined by another family
• Alli is older

The different country one is the big one. I can only imagine how horrible we will act and what stories will come from this trip. I AM EXCITED